The Voice Within

My real intention of creating this page is –like other bloggers will at least earn something, however, it appears like maintaining a site for that purpose is time consuming, very confusing and stressing that lately I just found out that I have turned this page into a virtual diary where I can vent, share my ideas and “talk” myself out.

I guess it all started when I found out that I have no one to talk with and is caged inside this four-cornered house (but of course we don’t have a circle house) 24/7 with the convenience of having round the clock access to the internet –of which they claim is the home of all of the most interesting “whatevers” that can take you out from your delusion and take you to an interesting and notable level of entertainment. But I guess this doesn’t apply to everybody and that includes me.

I am one of those home based professionals that try to make ends meet by facing my computer as early as 5AM until as late as 2AM the following day. With the privilege of course of managing my own time (meaning I choose when to take a break, rest and eat) that unfortunately often turns out to be deprived from me since there is no way will I waste a single minute to leave my computer (for the intent of earning not for myself but to help my family in making ends meet ---long list of debts, bills, needs and again –“whatevers”!) just to do those things.

And whenever during my long day and night at work, a friend would call or send a message (through text, email, etc) I need to at least take time to multitask between my works and them just so to be able to give time for them (and that’s no biggies though. I meant it every time I listen to their vents, frustrations, problems and “whatevers”).

And then here comes the last day of the week and although I hate it (but since it is a part of my weekly routine), I need to check on the needs of my family –food, bills, other stuff (although please don’t you ever think that I am married since I am definitely single! Maybe it’s the culture or could be the burden of being the first born that I need to take all of these responsibilities of helping them –and then again, it is my pleasure to do this, they’re my family, right?) So once I’m done with the “buckle list” that we need for the entire week, I need to get myself to the nearest market and store to buy all of the items listed. (just in time since I just received my salary for the week. Yey!)

Now here comes the time that I really feel exhausted that I think I need to treat myself –so I go by planning, estimating and calculating everything that I need. And once I’m done, I’ll end up cancelling the plan since looking at how much money I’d be wasting brings me back to thinking about the long list of debts, bills and “whatevers” that I need to prioritize.

Ho! I am no superwoman, so I turn to try to talk to my friends about life and stuff like that but wait –am I just talking to myself? If they’re not too busy, they’re too busy or just too busy. So okay, I guess I need to get back to facing my computer, work on my tasks, pout (whenever necessary), use both of my index fingers in stretching my lips (forcing it to smile) and say “what a loooonngggg day!” Well, I guess I’ll have my time when I’ll finally retire to my bed super late at night (no, very early the next morning –now that’s confusing!). My bed is my only reward, my pillow is my loyal friend and my blanket is my only comforter. And that Guy up there is the only person who hears my cry –the voice within (I am not really sure if I am into making loud cries that it resonates up to His place) but regardless of whatever His hearing skills are, I am thankful He is there just willing to listen to my cries!

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Please also visit my other blogs The[un]chef101. Thank you! :) 

How To Work On This Type Of Relationship

If you are reading this article and (is or was) in a relationship with someone from the other country (in a more decent term –foreigner), then I guess we might agree at some facts about dealing with the said relationship. Don’t speak a word yet if you are not one of us, mull over and read through this write up –see for yourself the “complications” and “challenges we have been facing.

The introduction and advancement of today’s technology has somehow provided both advantages and disadvantages to the end users (although overrated are the advantages). I am talking about the innovative gadgets, communication media and some other obvious technological advancement available today. These things weren't only used in gathering information –that is either for educational, recreation or work-related purposes (especially to the students, working professionals, learners and hobbyist) but also have provided great means of bridging the communication between two separate parties.

The internet has played the most crucial and significant role in this avenue. Not only this can be used in collecting information (researches), advertisements and businesses –some people benefit from its free of charge call features. Name any possible call options (with or without cam) that you can think and the internet has it all.

These made it possible for two different people coming from different locations of the world of different races meet, talk, and fall in love and then… fall apart?? The answer is the big YES. While “falling in love” and getting a relationship can sometimes be too slow (depends on how motivated and compelled you are in getting one), the recently available modernization of technology can channel such need.

There are various ways to have a “virtual” relationship. The most common (and unrivaled) means are through considering dating websites, social networks and chat rooms. With the hundreds of thousand subscribers (or members) from these sites, the rate of chances in “finding” your match is high. The downside however will be the issues of the website’s reliability and efficacy, the person’s fidelity and truthfulness as well as the risk of getting scammed or fooled. A month-long of knowing the person you met from these sites is not enough to finally decide that you are into a something legit enough to be called a “relationship”.

However, there were countless claims or successful relationship from online dating sites. And mind you, I've known a lot of friends that considered that approach! While I am one of those people who have a very long distance (thousands of miles if that’s enough to define the term) relationship, mine is different. I didn't meet him from any of these websites. We were introduced by a mutual friend. The courtship went fine (I guess both of us was able to adjust from each other’s differences) although there were times when complications and issues are unavoidable.

To those who weren't familiar with what I am talking about, here below are some of the possible issues that would rise within a relationship of two people separated by distance but also by some other components. Such issues could be something about:

·         Tradition, Religion And Culture. Even the smartest person will become dumb whenever a clash of culture and tradition is the concern. You certainly can’t argue with your partner about their nation’s practices and in the same manner will you not let them argue with yours. No one will ever prefer to get criticism regarding their belief. The motto would be “mind your own business”.

·         Lifestyle. While this might be impossible but this follows with the previous. Same manner, you can’t change your partner’s way of living their life (not unless if they voluntarily do it for your pleasure –congratulations to you!)

·         Social Status And Profession. Believe me or not, but this counts too. Say, how are you going to possibly deal with someone who can’t even take a grasp of what you were trying to say all because to her or him you are talking jargon when you actually are not. If you are a lawyer from another country, and your partner’s a lawyer from his or her country –there is no way will you talk about law since your countries abide from different sets of law! Neither will you make the person feel that you are far wealthier than him or her (although this never really happens often but there were cases when inadvertently you made him or her feel less).

·         Age Gap. Pacing is important here. You can’t just talk about Theodore Roosevelt to someone who was born 10 years after Mr. Roosevelt was killed! Expect to see the person grasping for some air as he or she is trying to understand everything you were trying to relay. In the same manner will you discuss about Britney Spears to a person who was born during Monroe’s time.

·         Communication Gap. I think this should be place on top of all of these factors. There were some slang (terms and words) used by different countries. And based on my experience, regardless of how I tried to understand what my man was talking about, I still was left blank and empty headed that I have to ask him to explain it to me. Call me half wit (it’s up to you) but not all foreign slang can be understood by everybody.

I guess what I am trying to say is that challenges, trials and issues are normal in a relationship. However, the tension would double for those people who come from different races, nations and beliefs. The best thing to do is to observe respect, extend patience, be open to understand and never forget to talk things out. Being upfront to each other really helps. Trust is another factor that needs to be enhanced as well.

Please also visit my other blogs The[un]chef101. And if you have not yet subscribed to my channel My Siesta  please click on the subscribe button and share this video so other people on the same diet can also enjoy this dish. Thank you very much!